Tracks In The Dust

26 Nov 2014

Thankful for Our Children

My wife has said before that as a parent you may not always like your kids, but you will always love them. There may be some sense in that for many of us. As our kids get older and become adults they have had plenty of time to formulate their own idea of the order of their lives. Sometimes they make poor choices ( and you wonder if anything soaked in during those younger years), sometimes they take things for granted or create problems that are not really there.

One thing I have learned as my kids got older ( they are all over 21 now) is that they are forever entwined in their childhood personas. When they were born, from the day they could actually respond to things around them, my wife and I could tell that each of our four children were unique in their own way. They had their own way of looking at the world from virtually the day they were born. And all the life lessons and teaching you could apply would help to shape the edges, but their personality was something they were born with.

So as adults my wife and I can still see it. We had 3 sons in a row, and each one of them had their own perspective on things. While one of them was Intellectually reason out the simplest of problems ( even at 3 years old), another one of them got easily frustrated and would work to plan to manipulate his surroundings , the third was laid back and things would roll off and he would work through things in such a simple way and just smile. My daughter was our last, she was earthy, of the earth she loves animals more than people, enjoys nature and adjusts to things overtime when she finds the balance.

One thing they all had in common was music, my children did not all become consummate musicians ( however one of them has composed a number of great songs playing all the instruments and vocals). But music was meaningful. It is the canvas in which our lives would speak through sound and emotion. It ties us together in so many ways.

So this holiday season, when my adult kids will all be visiting our home we are thankful. We are grateful that we have had the opportunity to experience being a parent and proud of what they have become.

24 Nov 2014

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Why Don’t You Say Hello!?

There are times when it seems we are just not connected to what’s going on around us. There are certainly times when I pass by someone on the street or in a store and they seem to be so deeply into “their world” that it can take pause to wonder if they realize they are in public.

Strangers avert their eyes, They don’t want to appear to be eager to talk or interact in any way. With news of such violent times all around us, it is probably to be expected that many do not want to initiate something that could result in harm or anguish.

It’s a shame though really.Being connected to the world means you can understand it more. Being connected to each other would help to prevent the very fear of the unknown that roots in our aversion. It is ironic that we can be so transparent on social media, where there is an electronic physical space between all of us, but face to face, it can seem so different.

Not everyone is like that. It is refreshing to see someone you don’t know who may catch your glance and say “good morning” or “hello” or something. Just an acknowledgment that we are all moving along in this timeline together. It doesn’t mean we have to be fast friends, or relate to each other on any subjective level. Just a polite smile and a “hello”.

It may be a little easier at the holidays. “Happy Holiday’s” or “Merry Christmas” seems to be okay and has some more appeal than just looking away. But then even-so, we may be addressing someone who doesn’t celebrate the season. But no matter, it is just the fact we intended to make contact, intended to recognize that there is another human-being going through waking hours and making an effort to live life.

Like all of us I’d guess, I struggle with a lot of burdens (health in particular) and I have a lot of opinions on things, but I am not trying to throw them to someone else with a simple “hello” or “good-day” – just seems the right thing to do. It can give comfort to the fact that we are humankind. Well for the most part anyway 😉

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Advice, choices, Compassion, Emotion, Grace, life is precious, Memories, Postive Thinking, Self-Awareness

17 Nov 2014

It’s Complicated

By now I think it is pretty obvious, everyone is looking for simple answers to complicated world. They are flocking to every outlet they can to find the answer, and hoping that the answer will provide them the calmness they desire to know that “everything will be alright”. But it is also probably no surprise that everything will not be alright. The world around us is complicated.

It always had been, but perhaps we weren’t so aware of the complications before. We had limited information about the complications, so we only knew what was hovering around our consciousness. We got our news from 20 minutes of TV or a half-read newspaper.

We called people on a phone and if they weren’t there we just left a message.No immediate response necessary. We didn’t look for others to provide us our opinion through 24 hours of TV or Internet. we had time to formulate it ourselves.

So the ingredients for complicating our lives is compounded by everything around us. The people who want to propagate all the fear, uncertainty and doubt. The fearful who want to share their fear with others so they can be less alone in their fear. They are all willing to communicate to you in the most immediate ways.

Dissatisfaction compounded by threats that can be enlarged by others who are dissatisfied, compounding fear and turning it into hate and misunderstanding. It is such a circle that it appears that there is no end, it keeps going round and round.

Local strife with the police, government strife with the way things are going – feeling out of control and looking for the only way to manage things in our lives that may be not complicated. But it is complicated.

The answer doesn’t has to be complicated however, there are ways to make change that are within our reach. Counting on our faith, reaching out for our hope, making peace with the world though Him.

In a time when being “dissatisfied” leaves to blaming others, to not look to our own accountability on things. Thinking that if there isn’t a simple answer there must be a conspiracy, or someone else to blame. That leads nowhere.

Don’t like something? Become active in making change. There are peaceful ways to get to the end.

Now back to your regular programming. I will step off my soap-box.

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged choices, Complications, Confusion, Definitions, Desire to be heard, Faith, God, Grace, Life, Postive Thinking, Reality Check, Searching, Self-Awareness, Simplicity, The "answer"

14 Nov 2014

The Value of Friendship

My wife and I have learned some valuable lessons in our lives. Those lessons have come to provide us with the insight and wisdom of being older. Unfortunately not everyone learns at the same pace I guess, while others may totally ignore life’s lessons and make no use of them in the course of their daily living.

One thing we have learned is that all things equal friends are something to be cherished more than any possession or place in life. Long lasting relationship kind of friends… they enrich your life, remind you that you are there for more than just treading though the 24 hours that exist each day. More than just accumulating money or possessions or fame. We are not rich by any means, but God has provided all that we are allowed, and that is enough.

Those lasting friendships bridge the gap of distance and time. They are sturdy and durable. They have meaning beyond words and create bonds that are stronger than even actions or deeds. I thank God for those friendships. My wife and I have some of those friendships and even when it would seem things have drifted apart by years of time- they are still there. To lend a kind word, to genuinely be concerned and provide caring to the wounded souls that we all can become.

This week some of our best and most recent friends in our journey have moved to another city. Far enough that even through the promise of visitations and constant contact …there will still be 1000+ miles between us. But no matter, we are richer in our lives for their entire family being in it. We enjoyed many holidays and weekends over the decade with their family and ours. We will always be best of friends with or without the distance.

In the past admittedly my family would be the one that would be leaving (we moved multiple times in our lives) and we would always be sad for our departure because of those friendships. But in the end those very dear friends we came to know along the journey are still there in our lives. Still calling on the phone, writing long emails and texts,sharing each others happiness and sadness, dropping a thoughtful note or just being in each others prayers (can use a lot of that lately). There may be gaps along the way where we don’t talk (sometimes long ones) but when we reconnect it is just like it was yesterday.

So I am thankful for that. Our life’s reflection is better for all of those truly genuine friendships. Perhaps you feel the same.

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Being Thankful, Change, cherish, Emotion, family and friends, Friends, Friendships, Grace, life is precious, losing friends, Postive Thinking, Prayers, Richness of life

07 Nov 2014

Fear of the Unknown

Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

Maria Robinson, American author

New beginnings come with the idea that there is always unknowns about where the journey should lead. I know I struggle with that every day. It compounds itself in worry, or makes me pull-back from what I am doing and do little or nothing at all. It can make we wish that tomorrow would not come, when there is really no way to stop it. It can create things in the moment that stop me from seeing the things that are right in front of me.

So fear of the unknown is likely to be something to contend with. Our worry over our loved ones, family and children, worry over how to make ends meet or our health. With that worry comes unhappiness, and the possibility of depression.

So what to do about it? For me I have to learn better to share my fears. With my loved ones, with my friends and spiritual leaders. with God who are all in my life. I have always been private about things in general I guess. I probably got that from my father who seemed to be like that when I was growing up. Perhaps the stoic approach seems good on the surface- after all “why burden others” with your worries and fears?

What you find out is that if you share them, most other people have worries and fears as well. Many times the very same ones. There is no way to turn back the clock. But I can start today and make a new ending…by sharing my fears and thoughts with those who love me. For some ( perhaps even reading this blog) that may mean very little, for others it may allow them to understand themselves better as well.