moments | Tracks In The Dust

Archive for the tag “moments”

07 Jun 2014

If It Makes You Happy

“If it makes you happy, then why are you so sad?” Great words from a great song that my family loved. It is just an easy question that can sometimes have the most difficult answer.

But really what is it that makes you happy? Is it goodness, something that you can cherish and embrace and love because you are you?

Then why the hell are you so sad (as the song goes)? Life is so very short and then it is over and we can look forward to the eternity ahead. But in the mean time we all need to get more inspired. There is so little time, and while we are here on Earth we have to make our tracks.

We have to embrace those things that are positive, make the best of them and be sure we are “right” with our world first. Before we are right with the rest of the world and all it offers, before we try to search for the meaning of life for others, we need to understand our meaning.

It is “purpose”- and those that defer purpose, or decline it all together are missing so much. I mean do they look at it like “first you live, then you die and make the most of everything in-between”? Or do you look at it as the more you embrace the purpose of life, the more happy you will be?

“If it makes you happy” doesn’t mean to do whatever you want and damn the circumstances. It means what really makes you happy when you understand the purpose of what you are doing here. Understand your part in the process of life, and it is a grand scheme… but a good one.

So advice to my kids: make sure you enjoy it, but be sure you understand your purpose. And look for it- when it arrives be sure to embrace it- and you will be happy.

Here ya go kids. What we used to sing in the car as loud as we could. If it Makes You Happy!

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Change, choices, Finding Your Way Back, Happiness, Happy, Joy, life is precious, Looking for Happiness, moments, Postive Thinking, Sadness, Sheryl Crow

05 Jun 2014

3 Comments

A Secret Message That Should be Told

Wise words. Don’t usually copy something here, but this was a great article (from People Magazine). Sharing it.

On May 28, 13-year-old British schoolgirl Athena Orchard tragically lost her battle with the bone cancer osteosarcoma, which had affected her spine, left shoulder and head.

Yet her devastated family has received a small degree of solace from what Athena secretly left behind: a 3,000-word note written on the back of her bedroom mirror, in black marker.

Her father, Dean, stumbled upon the secret message – and a box full of self-penned songs – at the family’s home in Leicester, England. It details the innermost feelings of a girl who had put up a courageous fight for her life.

The heartbreaking note reads: “Every day is special, so make the most of it, you could get a life-ending illness tomorrow so make the most of every day. Life is only bad if you make it bad.”

Dean, 33, said of the note: “She never mentioned it, but it’s the kind of thing she’d do. She was a very spiritual person, she’d go on about stuff that I could never understand – she was so clever.”

Athena left behind six sisters and three brothers. But her mother, Caroline, 37, said that the note Athena bequeathed the family will help ensure that her memory stays very much alive.

“We’re keeping the mirror forever, it is a part of her we can keep in the house, it will always be in her room,” she said. “Just reading her words felt like she was still here with us, she had such an incredible spirit.”

Read an expanded excerpt from Athena’s message, below:

“Happiness depends upon ourselves. Maybe it’s not about the happy ending, maybe it’s about the story.

The purpose of life is a life of purpose. The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra.

Happiness is a direction not a destination. Thank you for existing. Be happy, be free, believe, forever young. You know my name, not my story.

You have heard what I’ve done, but not what I’ve been through. Love is like glass, looks so lovely but it’s easy to shatter.

Love is rare, life is strange, nothing lasts and people change. Every day is special, so make the most of it, you could get a life ending illness tomorrow so make the most of every day. Life is only bad if you make it bad.

If someone loves you, then they wouldn’t let you slip away no matter how hard the situation is. Remember that life is full of ups and downs.

Never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about. I want to be that girl who makes the bad days better and the one that makes you say my life has changed since I met her!

Love is not about how much you say I love you – it’s about how much you can prove it’s true. Love is like the wind, you can feel it but you can’t see it. I’m waiting to fall in love with someone I can open my heart to.

Love is not about who you can see spending your future with, it’s about who you can’t see spending your life without… Life is a game for everyone but love is the prize. Only I can judge me.

Sometimes love hurts. Now I’m fighting myself. Baby I can feel your pain. Dreams are my reality. It hurts but it’s okay, I’m used to it.

Don’t be quick to judge me, you only see what I choose to show you… you don’t know the truth. I just want to have fun and be happy without being judged.

This is my life, not yours, don’t worry about what I do. People gonna hate you, rate you, break you, but how strong you stand, that’s what makes you… you!

There’s no need to cry because I know you’ll be by my side.”

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged being remembered, Cancer, choices, Compassion, Faith, Happiness, Life, mental-health, moments, Reality Check, Self-Awareness

22 May 2014

2 Comments

Empty Nest

Empty nesting time. It is a reality for almost all parents at one time or another. Notice I don’t say “all” parents because I can suppose that some 30-year-old adults are still living with their parents somewhere ( for good or bad).

Empty Nesters

My wife and I can recall some of those days when they were very young. We’d wish for them to be a bit older and provide us some quiet nights sleep and a bit less chasing them around to keep things out of their mouths.

As they grew older we started to realize there were just “different” levels of challenges. Dating, distractions, puberty, peer pressure that leads to all of the moments when you ask yourself ” is this really my child?” During their teens it was sometimes hard to distinguish how they would totally forget the lessons that we would have hoped the had learned in their “formative” years. But yes, they did forget. Often in some cases.

But mistakes will happen ( hopefully not catastrophic or life threatening… each which I have learned can be different) 🙂

We had one child who left abruptly when he turned 18, and didn’t look back. We didn’t really interact with him at all but after 12 years we have finally come to know him again thank fully.

It is hard to let go, but they all have to find their own course in life, and what you have taught them (and they retained) has to be good enough.

My advice to my kids ( if they read these now, or later) is to be centered in who you are spiritually, remember the fundamentals between right and wrong, it’s okay to make mistakes, its okay to be frustrated and angry with life- but you need to make something out of those pitfalls. Apply the lesson to what’s going on ahead in your life.

So here we are – with our empty nest. But honestly we have 4 great kids who we love more than anything, and they are out on their own making a “go” of it. We’ll embrace them the best way we know how. Yup, and here I am at tracks in the dust still trying to share advice. Guess we can all learn no matter how old we get. I am learning how to be an older parent.

Posted in Before and After Things Change and tagged being remembered, Change, choices, Empty Nest, Empty Nesters, Growing up, leaving home, Letting Go, making mistakes, moments, Opinion, Reality Check, relationships

21 May 2014

4 Comments

A Dog’s Life For Me

I grew up with cats. My mom had them since I was in elementary school and had one long after I left home. When my wife and I first met she had dogs in her family. Family dogs with a long history. After we got married apartment life and planned moving from town to town left “cats” as the only option. Decades and all the kids out of the house, we have finally become an “all dog” house.

The last family cat finally made it to its “next” of nine lives ( one of my sons thinks the best that maybe he came back as a porpoise or something).

So I am learning, dogs are great, they can be loyal and loving. They can be like taking care of little kids who will endlessly be toddlers at best. I get that now. My dog Jake has been part of our lives for almost a year of his two-year old mutt-life, he is probably not all that smart but very lovable.

My wife’s dog Eva has been her lifeline and is still mainly just “her” dog. She is only 4 but knows who she loves best, and gets the special treatment she feels she deserves from my wife everyday.

I am sure lifetime dog owners can provide all sorts of reasons for the goodness of dogs. Guess it took me decades to get to the point to learn.

I am not certain of all of the reasons, but hey- I got a goofy dog that seems to follow me around. and loves the attention. Brings us a bird or a bunny on occasion as his proud trophy. Never passes up a treat or some scratching on his tummy. That’s worth some joy everyday. Woof

That’s Jake on the left and Eva on the right.

Posted in Before and After Things Change and tagged Acceptance, animals, Cats, Change, choices, Dogs, family pets, moments, Owning a dog, Owning a pet, pet companions, pets, Reality Check

01 May 2014

Music: The Next 15 Favorite Albums of All Time

Okay, Loved the comments and additions. Maybe there are some others out there that have a list of favorite albums. Not talking songs, but complete albums.

On vinyl, on CD or just digital if you have to – but what are your 10 …or 20?

My last MUSIC post was my top 10 → Music: Favorite Albums of All Time

Here is my other 15… you have an opinion- chime in….

11 Chicago Transit Authority: In high school, I was in a rock band that had a horn section. This was as good as anything we knew for white boys and with a horn section. And we played a lot of it when we gigged. We were entranced with the Introduction song- and The Beginning. Just art in a great way. The band was never that good again after the first albums. BTW: Check out Terry Kath’s guitar, it is very good.

12 Bob Marley: Rastaman Vibration Nothing was ever, ever, ever the same after I heard this album. Nothing. This was epiphany for a part of music that became the rhythm of life, then the rhythm of a nation, then a rhythm of a movement which has never died. I still stop to listen to this album. I stop. I smile. Gave 2 of my kids a copy of the Legend CD. I think from time to time they listen to it, and feel what it says. I bought every other album he and the Wailers had. Exodus– okay that could be in the list.

13 Rolling Stones Sticky Fingers: It would be too hard to pick one, but I picked one that has so many memories for me that I can’t shake it. From the actual zipper on the Warhol cover- to the magic of Keith’s guitar on “Can’t You Hear Me Knockin” or Mick’s voice on “Wild Horses”. I know, I know- Exile on Main Street. Let It Bleed could be there too- this just captured it for me.

14 Police: Synchronicity: For me, it just captured everything that was that “time”. Music was getting more sophisticated and more stupid at the same time. This was proof that intelligent music could be made, with songs that had musicians playing that knew what made a song a solid song end-to-end. I was pleased to have seen them at the beginning and then again many years later during their reunion.

15 Led Zeppelin II: For me –I had listened to Led Zep 1, I loved it and wondered what would be next. I bought LZ2 right around the same time that I had to buy my Blind Faith album for the second time (because some guy had puked on my first copy at one of my parties). LZ 2 was so tight – so dynamic- blues, rock, Robert’s voice, Jimmy’s guitar and a drum line that was one of Bonham’s best. Just my fave. I know LZ fanatics would probably argue. But this was the most influential for me in my musical career and as a “rock” album.

16 The Doors – their first album. This album just screwed me out of listening to the Beatles for a while. It was just that different; I was listening to After Bathing At Baxter’s from Jefferson Airplane at the time. I caught “The End” on an FM radio station while was taking a break from it … I ran out and got the album. I didn’t think that it would do what it did to me. LA Woman was like that too, this was just first.

17 Copeland: Beneath the Medicine Tree: Okay one from this last decade (2004 I think). Not classic rock. This is a VERY personal choice. Only no one else will care than me. There is a set of songs that are so perfect that I can’t believe that they are from some emo band from Florida. But they are so good. There is a song: “Sing with your head up, with your eyes closed, not because you love the song, because you love to sing. “ Or “Paula Sparks”. Aaron Marsh is the band leader- the guitar riffs are wonderful. It is pop to some extent, just well constructed. Took a break, but they have a new album coming out in October. Been together for 25 years? Wow.

18 Joni Mitchell: Hejira – I could have put Court and Spark, or Blue… but I think this choice was just because of the time of my life, the way the songs sowed together in a jazz, blues, folk sort of way. It just worked for me at the time, and her voice is one of a kind. Nothing like it –nothing since. And her standing on the ice in Madison Wi on the cover. (my home state) Its all good. I just listened to it again the other day.

19 Sly Stone: Everyday People– the funk that lead me to Tower of Power, Prince and so much more. As a friend of mine said at the time “unlock the rock box and expand your head to new things” or something like that… over 60% of my high school was black, and I had so much of this music and the other stuff it spawned- G Clinton, Funkadelics, all of the Philadelphia sounds that went above the hit factory of what I knew to be Motown. It was party music, it was dance music, it was soul music, and it was date music. It just fit.

20 Santana Abraxsas: I was listening to a lot of jazz at the time, there was this radio station in San Francisco that was syndicated and played through a Chicago station on the weekends. It played a lot of really good jazz. Then somewhere in the middle, it played some of the songs from Abraxsas. Damn. I had the first album, but somehow this trumped that. Back in the day of this music renaissance, a lot of bands had 2nd albums that evolved from their first ones- I think that is what made them long term classics, it wasn’t about the one hit album- it was a body of work.

21 Frank Zappa: One Size Fits All: I had owned several Frank Zappa albums before I heard this one for the first time. This great DJ and I were sitting listening to “Florentine Pogen” in the college radio studio late one night on his shift. I was the station manager and did on-air stuff, but he was just into this stuff. Everything I had heard had been great. This was outstanding. I can still play the guy loud and get a certain state of mind that you can’t get with most other artist. A fantastic guitar player, self-taught, incredible musician and someone who, even as productive as he had been was lost too soon in the music world. He died of prostate cancer, which I am personally fighting myself. It makes a difference.

22 Black Sabbath: Listening to their first album just made me wonder how I missed this kind of music before. My parents hated it. They didn’t understand it. Then I realized that there really wasn’t anything else like it. It was where metal would go that would end up being copy-cats… but this is the original.

23 Blonde on Blonde: It started when my older brother had given me a copy of Bob Dylan’s “FreeWheelin’” when I was really young. I started listening to music when I was 6 or 7, and I just couldn’t understand some of the kids around me that were listening to Herman’s Hermits and told me that Bob Dylan was not that good cause he couldn’t sing like Peter Noone. Okay- I liked pop. But I loved this album.

24 Yes: Roundabout: “In and around the lake- mountains come out of the sky and they stand there.” Damn- this record was great. It was prog. rock, art rock- it was whatever you want to classify it as- but it is just the combination of sounds that were unique musically. Man- then Close to the Edge. Incredible- prog rock often didn’t get the credit it deserved. Still doesn’t. (ELO- how bout that?)

25 Abbey Road: I could have listed the White Album or Revolver. Whenever the newest release would come out from the Beatles I had to get it the first day. I think I played this album all weekend over and over again when I bought it. It was just the way that it was constructed and the whole suite of songs to the swan song of “In The End….”. I was going out with a girl in Jr. High who was a huge fan of the Beatles too. She and I spent the next weekend listening to it over and over. A year later she died of leukemia and I listen to the album differently still to this day. It’s like a dinner with all the ingredients – nothing missing.

Could I list 20 more? For sure. I missed some gems. Then there is jazz. Whoa.

Also there are very many complete albums by artists my millennial kids have introduced me to that actually could make this list too. Still some very good music to hear out there…Thanks specially to Andrew McMahon, Chris Carrabba, Anthony Green and Leighton Antelman (Lydia) – some great pop artist in an alternative world.

What is your list like? Personal I am sure- but List it. Go ahead it won’t hurt.