Tracks In The Dust

23 May 2014

The High Speed of Information

The speed in which we get our information today has changed our lives forever. I was watching a movie from the late 70’s or early 80’s with my twenty year old daughter the other night, it was a thriller. There was a murderer on the loose and one of his victims got away. Unfortunately they were in a cabin out in the woods and the murderer had ‘cut the phone line”. My daughter laughed and wondered why they wouldn’t just use their smartphone. Was there no reception?

I had to remind her that there were no cell phones back then ( way back in the day). She really had to wonder how people dealt with that back then. What happened in the old days? I told her that the cell phone ( and the Internet) has changed the way history is made and our lifestyles in more ways than she would every realize, since she grew up with both for most of her life.

We are so accustomed to instant feedback, instant information, instant responses and access to communicating with just about anyone anywhere. Libraries, long distance calls and having to wait for answers are a thing of the past for the most part.

Maybe that’s why everyone is so much less patient it seems these days. Every thing is “now”… and quick. In lines at the store scanning our groceries, paying by plastic card with swipe, packing 2 things to each plastic bag and driving the cart to the car asap.

Even texts can’t wait? A friend of mine texted me the other day, and when I didn’t respond quick enough the follow-up text was ” are you okay?” Nice enough to ask but really.. I was just busy. Maybe that is the ultimate issue with driving and texting. Everyone is looking for an immediate answer? I always thought it was the advantage of text vs. voice calls. No hurry, just texting…. but that doesn’t seem to always apply.

So the idea that the answer could be “wait I will have to think about it” may seem a bit put-offish. But that may have been the good thing about what was “the good old days”- the pause for thought before answering . Seems like those immediate answers could provide immediate satisfaction, but can also mean immediate damage.

Pause here for some thought on the matter. 🙂

So the bad guys in the movies these days? … gotta watch out. The world will know you are coming in one tweet, text and post on the Internet.

Posted in Before and After Things Change and tagged Cell phone, Change, choices, Instant Gratification, Internet, landlines, Life, old movies, Science and Technology, smartphones, Texting, tracks in the dust

22 May 2014

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Empty Nest

Empty nesting time. It is a reality for almost all parents at one time or another. Notice I don’t say “all” parents because I can suppose that some 30-year-old adults are still living with their parents somewhere ( for good or bad).

Empty Nesters

My wife and I can recall some of those days when they were very young. We’d wish for them to be a bit older and provide us some quiet nights sleep and a bit less chasing them around to keep things out of their mouths.

As they grew older we started to realize there were just “different” levels of challenges. Dating, distractions, puberty, peer pressure that leads to all of the moments when you ask yourself ” is this really my child?” During their teens it was sometimes hard to distinguish how they would totally forget the lessons that we would have hoped the had learned in their “formative” years. But yes, they did forget. Often in some cases.

But mistakes will happen ( hopefully not catastrophic or life threatening… each which I have learned can be different) 🙂

We had one child who left abruptly when he turned 18, and didn’t look back. We didn’t really interact with him at all but after 12 years we have finally come to know him again thank fully.

It is hard to let go, but they all have to find their own course in life, and what you have taught them (and they retained) has to be good enough.

My advice to my kids ( if they read these now, or later) is to be centered in who you are spiritually, remember the fundamentals between right and wrong, it’s okay to make mistakes, its okay to be frustrated and angry with life- but you need to make something out of those pitfalls. Apply the lesson to what’s going on ahead in your life.

So here we are – with our empty nest. But honestly we have 4 great kids who we love more than anything, and they are out on their own making a “go” of it. We’ll embrace them the best way we know how. Yup, and here I am at tracks in the dust still trying to share advice. Guess we can all learn no matter how old we get. I am learning how to be an older parent.

Posted in Before and After Things Change and tagged being remembered, Change, choices, Empty Nest, Empty Nesters, Growing up, leaving home, Letting Go, making mistakes, moments, Opinion, Reality Check, relationships

21 May 2014

4 Comments

A Dog’s Life For Me

I grew up with cats. My mom had them since I was in elementary school and had one long after I left home. When my wife and I first met she had dogs in her family. Family dogs with a long history. After we got married apartment life and planned moving from town to town left “cats” as the only option. Decades and all the kids out of the house, we have finally become an “all dog” house.

The last family cat finally made it to its “next” of nine lives ( one of my sons thinks the best that maybe he came back as a porpoise or something).

So I am learning, dogs are great, they can be loyal and loving. They can be like taking care of little kids who will endlessly be toddlers at best. I get that now. My dog Jake has been part of our lives for almost a year of his two-year old mutt-life, he is probably not all that smart but very lovable.

My wife’s dog Eva has been her lifeline and is still mainly just “her” dog. She is only 4 but knows who she loves best, and gets the special treatment she feels she deserves from my wife everyday.

I am sure lifetime dog owners can provide all sorts of reasons for the goodness of dogs. Guess it took me decades to get to the point to learn.

I am not certain of all of the reasons, but hey- I got a goofy dog that seems to follow me around. and loves the attention. Brings us a bird or a bunny on occasion as his proud trophy. Never passes up a treat or some scratching on his tummy. That’s worth some joy everyday. Woof

That’s Jake on the left and Eva on the right.

Posted in Before and After Things Change and tagged Acceptance, animals, Cats, Change, choices, Dogs, family pets, moments, Owning a dog, Owning a pet, pet companions, pets, Reality Check

16 May 2014

Reconnecting with Old Friends

There is something great about reconnecting with old friends. It helps to remind you of where you were. Even though you can’t go back in time and relive those days, it is nice to ground yourself once in a while. Good for the soul.

Wishing you can go back will be pretty hollow, but looking at that notch in time is a good way to evaluate your place in time- in the “now”.

There is certainly some remembrances of things you desire to forget. Those awkward times when life deals the blows that land bruises, loss of loved ones and painful experiences.

There are also things you wish you could put in a highlight reel, those things you were proud of – the accomplishments of goals and desires you have had over the years.

Then there are those very special remembrances with those genuine friends and family that if you could “bottle” the feelings of comfort and joy, you would open that bottle frequently and drink that in.

But change is going to happen. And some of your closest friends now may be just part of the future memories you may embrace.

Have you had those times when you’ d hope it would never end, but looking back later, it may have been the best thing? Disconnecting from people who ultimately create a negative influence can be hard to do. We may not even recognize that we are deep in the influence of friends who mean the best, but end up keeping things from happening in our lives.

So it is good to reconnect with old friends isn’t it?

Great for remembering who you were, the fabric of what you are now, and where things came to get you to today…. because still in the end there is “no day but today”.

Friends ( by Elton John and Bernie Taupin)

I hope the day will be a lighter highway
For friends are found on every road
Can you ever think of any better way
For the lost and weary travelers to go

Making friends for the world to see
Let the people know you got what you need
With a friend at hand you will see the light
If your friends are there then everything’s all right

It seems to me a crime that we should age
These fragile times should never slip us by
A time you never can or shall erase
As friends together watch their childhood fly

Posted in Learning Lessons Along the Journey Of Life, Life's Sound Track (Music) and tagged Change, Changes, cherish, choices, Friends, life is precious, Memories, Reality Check, reconnecting, Remembering the past, Self-Awareness, Slow Down, Today, tracks in the dust, Who Are You, Yesterday

15 May 2014

1 Comment

Driving Under The Influence of Stupidity

Okay I am not really complaining, but maybe sort of. When I was a kid in order to get my drivers license it was required that I take a “defensive driving” course. It taught me how to be sure to anticipate the people and things that could come up as possible threats or obstacles as you drive.

I can’t help noticing that these days people seem to be driving “offensively” more than on the defense. I see people making last minute decisions to cut into lanes, people who make turns from lanes that are supposed to be for thru traffic. They seem to be doing it intentionally. Maybe they are unaware ( that would actually be scarier).

Any way you look at it, the idea that people can just make those decisions without care for those around them makes me wonder how many times a day they are being avoided. Maybe its the generation that grew up on video games. All the way back to “rad racer” and ever since, it seems like simulated road maneuvers and even road rage are centered around those kind of games. I’ve played them myself. They are fun, but not reality.

My dad taught me that if you miss an exit on the highway or a turn on the street, you find the next exit or turn and make a correction. Just the other day I saw someone move from a lane 4 lanes away to get to their exit at the very last minute. I was glad I was far enough behind to miss any possible swerving as we were going 70 mph at the time. Did that person have any idea that they could have caused an accident, or even the loss of human life? Not entirely sure.

Okay- so easy to complain I guess. Just want to be sure that my kids learn the “defense” because the offense seems to be the majority these days. It probably has always been that way, but it seems more obvious to me than I can recall in my decades of driving.

Do you see it that way where you live?