Doubt | Tracks In The Dust

Archive for the tag “Doubt”

07 Aug 2012

Looking for Life’s GPS

The other day I was driving to some places I had never been before and taking some guests around our huge metro area. So I brought out the GPS device. Global satellite positioning means that this little screen can always tell where you are on the face of the Earth, and help you by providing the directions needed to reach your final destination. It’s amazing that so many years ago that concept would have been some sort of “space age” future miracle you would see in sci-fi movies.

Now it is a reality that is entirely possible and can show up on your handheld smartphone or sit neatly on your dashboard wherever you go. And announce what turns and lanes you should be in. Wow.

It would be nice if our lives had a device for reaching our goals and destinations in life. We could just type in where we wanted to end up, and let the life-GPS just program it. It would talk to you, just like the GPS’s do today. Part of the features of the GPS lets you know when you get “off course” by announcing “recalculating your route” adjusting your course and helping you get turned around the right way.

Often in life we get off course, and there just isn’t that convenient GPS in our pocket to turn our lives back on course. The course corrections are ours to make, sometimes with guidance from others around us. The people we trust, the people we admire or sometimes from those who have alternative motivations that may not be the best course. We may get lost because we get distracted. In my GPS for the car, you can program “attractions” along the way, but in our lives some of those are more interesting than others, and in other cases they are indeed “distractions” rather than attractions, although we may be drawn to them.

So what course do we program into our life’s GPS? How well would we listen to the instructions it would speak out to us. Would we ignore it? It could sit on our dashboard and tell us when we made a wrong turn to our final goal. Of course we could end up with detours, and construction or accidents that may slow our lives course down. But the GPS would just recalculate. Funny.

But we don’t have a GPS for our lives here on Earth. There is nothing we can program. We have to rely on our family and friends and importantly our spiritual leaders that will provide us the feedback we need to make corrections when things go astray. Sure we can just wander like nomads on the map, in hope of getting where we think we want to be, but in the end we have to keep our eyes and ears open to where we are going and who we are listening to.

But we also have to keep our hearts and minds open to God and his plan. Without it we may be recalcuating in circles that eventually get us lost. For many of us, we so much want to stay “on the map” and headed in the proper direction. In the end it will lead to the best destination we could all want. It starts by programming it in… go ahead. You can do it.

Posted in Learning Lessons Along the Journey Of Life and tagged Change, Doubt, Eternity, Faith, God, GPS, Life, Reality Check, Self-Awareness, Sprituality

02 Jul 2012

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Our Emotional Life

Emotion is such a human thing, isn’t it? We thrive on it and need it to be able to exist. The emotional range of life provides us the very highest of happiness to the depths of sadness, from grief to elation, from the top of achievement and all that goes with it, to the bottom of disappointment in failure.

All of these are part of being human, of living our lives however long they may be. But for some of us we try so hard to put emotions away – bury them so that they cannot get out where others may see them. Yet for others, these emotions trap us in a place where then we can often get caught. It is then we get stuck for what seems endless days, weeks perhaps even years where no escape appears. Perhaps we cannot see the escape, or maybe we just aren’t looking for it. Sure, and there are those who are forever on that “high” as well, blindly flying along with the need to drive to the pinnacle every day. Taking in everything and everyone around them like a vacuum, and not stopping to see what falls along the wayside as the go.

Emotion is human, and it has a lot to do with our progress in life. It drives the very reasons that we persevere, it kindles the very fires that keep us burning for more. It is the center of love, it is the root of hate. It fuels happiness and fear. We fight it, we resist its change, and yet we cherish it and love its diversity. We let it control us and we sometimes let it make us do things we know in our heart are not right, but also let us guide us toward the power of the Spirit by loving everything and everyone around us.

How do you handle it? Are you on the rollercoaster and it goes up and down, or the carousel that goes endlessly around? When you sense it is changing, do you find yourself fighting it? How do you understand when it has clouded your heart? Do you smother your emotions or let them breathe? I guess the first thing to do seems to be to recognise they are there for us because we need them. It may be good to be passionately involved with your emotions. Don’t be angry that they exist, but be sure you have the opportunity to experience them without forever trapping your at the extremes. How would you recognise the difference otherwise.

“To ignore, repress, or dismiss our feelings is to fail to listen to the stirrings of the Spirit within our emotional life.” Brennan Manning

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Doubt, Emotion, Happiness, Joy, Love, moments, Philosophy, Self-Awareness, Sprituality, Thought

02 May 2012

Just Because You Should, Doesn’t Mean You Will

Just because you should, doesn’t mean you will.

Okay so this is the follow up to my previous post Just Because You Can, Doesn’t Mean You Should.

I find myself in this situation very often. There is a list of things I should do. Many of them are things that would make me a better person, others are just things that I know would be nice to accomplish for what my dad used to say “the good of the order.” There are plenty of excuses as to reasons why I can’t (see my post The Scale of Accountability). There are many reasons that I just put things off. When I was young my dad also used to say that I was definitely a “pro-crastinator” on some things– as opposed to an amateur one I guess.

But besides putting things off or just finding excuses, I find that when I reflect on everything I have done at the end of each day, there are several things that got in the way. I let them I suppose, or I prioritized them way down the list when I shouldn’t. They get relegated to “tomorrow” stuff… or put on the weekend list. That’s just going to happen because there are only so many hours in the day left over after work and sleep and eating.

Something’s may just be simple things to do, but when piled up together they are like a bunch of pieces of a puzzle that look difficult to assemble. Some of those things need more time- more quality time, or more concentration than my brain-cells have to offer. Yet others may be things that are not that desirable to have to do in the first place, and then that too weighs on the decision to do them.

Sure there are chores, house repairs, detailed cleaning, running the errands of the day, paying bills, corresponding with emails and messages from friends and family, and so many other things that seem to “task” the lists. What easily gets pushed farther aside is the focus that I need to keep grounded in what is truly important… and that alone seems to get pushed around on the “to do” list.

At the end of it all- doing what is important to feed yourself spiritually should be at the top of the list. For me that would be spending time in the Word. It may be just meditating on the positive things that I should be sharing with the people around me. It may just be sitting down with my family and enjoying each other’s company, or with my wife and longtime partner in this journey…taking time to really know how her day went or what she is feeling today.

There I go then… things I should do… but don’t get to. Even examining the things that get in the way is an entry on my “to do” list. If you use Excel spreadsheets- I envision it to the error message for a “circular reference” – put on the to-do list to clear the to-do list.

I will get to it soon!

Nope. Maybe right now… how about you?

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Change, choices, Doubt, Family, Home, life is precious, Procrastination, Reality Check, Sprituality, Time management

30 Apr 2012

4 Comments

Just Because You Can, Doesn’t Mean You Should

Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. That’s what my wife has been reflecting on often these past weeks, and it is something seems to apply to so many things in life.

Here in America, perhaps it goes along with being a country full of “consumers”. Mass consumption can get so extreme that creates the notion that getting more of everything that others have, getting the super-sized item or getting the most valuable item means contentment. It’s like the thought is: “after all, if we earned it we should deserve it”. Some see it as being able to do whatever you want and some others doing it in spite of what others want; often without considering any consequences. I have heard it said “If it is not illegal or immoral, just go ahead if you can afford it. “

Sadly it seems there are so many messages in the course of a day that just keep working on influencing our sensibilities. Upgrade your car, your home, your life… or make sure you are always happy. Don’t get left behind and be certain you have the newest! Whatever the message it feels like it is aimed at you to be sure you can measure your value in life somehow. Whether it’s on the media or from the people around you, it can appeal to your peace-of-mind, or the need to be recognized by others.

Sometimes it isn’t as serious as much as it is perhaps ironic. Out shopping at a local large discount store on the weekends, I see people who are wearing clothes that don’t flatter them, really don’t fit them or worse yet make them look like they are wearing someone else’s clothes. Seriously, just because they make those short-shorts in that green glowing color in their size does not mean they should be wearing them! Funny really- not that everyone shouldn’t have a positive body image, but there are times when it is worthy of a chuckle.

In other cases it is so much more subtle. Some divorced friends of mine in the past wrestled for legal custody of their children. It was obvious who would come out on the side of custody, but just because it could be done, didn’t mean it should. The children get the wrong end of the settlement, and the awarded parent just “could” and therefore did.

While yet so many other couples we know, just keep working themselves to death to help pay off their debit because they have bought so much on credit. Just because they could, they did- they bought things and went places- on credit. It made them happy temporarily and then over time, it pushed them into the brink of disaster in their personal lives and their relationship because they realized the things around them did nothing to validate who they really were wanting to be.

It can work that way in life I think. Just because you can own it, doesn’t mean you should. Just because you can take it, doesn’t mean you should. Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you always should. Consuming all you can devour for the sake of doing it… is more than simply self-centered road…it also affects others around you in so many ways.

There are so many better doors to go through, so many more roads to take. So many more reasons to take them… and most of those you can take just because they are there- if you choose to take them…because you can.

Posted in Before and After Things Change and tagged Acceptance, Change, choices, Doubt, Life, Reality Check, Self-Awareness, Slow Down, Truth, Who Are You

17 Apr 2012

1 Comment

Negotiating With Yourself

Unbelievable as it seems I am my best negotiator. But even more incredible is that most of the time I am negotiating with myself. I find that I often work hard to win, but as ironic as it may be- sometimes I lose. How can I lose when I am negotiating with myself? Easy.

Wrestling with the things that I know I should work to do better in my life can sometimes take a long time. I can even declare a “win” on one day and find it was actually anything but a win. Yet there I am – the master negotiator in what direction I could take, what would make the best sense, how it would compare with other things I have done in the past. Sometimes it seems like new horizons are almost easier to decide because there are many unknowns… can’t talk myself out of things if I really don’t have a confident argument to the contrary. Yet many of the easiest things to decide still have their struggles: diets, paying attention to your health, saving for the future, learning more about the things that puzzle you in life. They are all about focus on devoting the effort, but still they involve constant debate with your life’s daily course.

So each day I grab onto reasons why I can or can’t do something. Sometimes it results in stalling out on doing anything. ( Okay Freudian fans, I know the view). Being human means that making mistakes are just part of the natural progression of things, but yet the tendency is to not be public about it, or put others in harm’s way, or do something so wrong that it is against the very grain of your soul and spirit. “Analysis paralysis” others will call it. Better to not do anything, not change anything because of the consequences. Don’t want to upset the rhythm of things.

For me, when I finally negotiate the time, and make the argument with myself that will stick ( maybe even share it with my loved ones to see what they say)- then I proudly go forward. I make the “move”. It’s then I realize that some of the most impulsive things I have done in my life were equally as successful steps along the path. Trusting in yourself has rewards- centered on the positive, on your heart, on the spirit of the Word, on the course that will be forever history in your lifetime once you’ve charted it.

There are often many steps that will require negotiation and course correction. It’s just taking them in the first place. How well do you negotiate your course in life? Do you trust your inner negotiator to win? Do you use your inner compass along the way to make the corrections as you travel this time on Earth?