Tracks In The Dust

A Father's Advice About Learning the Mission of Life

Archive for the tag “Slow Down”

All Summer Long

There it is – almost “autumn” again. Fall. The time when as I remember in my youth was the beginning of school, the time when days get shorter and nights get colder.

Autumn is a pleasant time really, except that the rainy days start to show up and knock down the leaves. The wind kicks up and shakes the trees. In the days of old, its harvest time. Time to collect up provisions and get ready for winter.

But for most of us its been the turn of a calendar that brings summer to a close, takes on the idea that we are getting older but wiser.   In the US it means holidays ahead like Halloween ( is that really a holiday?) and Thanksgiving and Christmas. Time for family and friends – for remembrances.

Light a candle in the window, put a log on the fire. Pull out the sweater and warm socks. Its autumn.

But then again. Living in Texas (where I have been for 13 years)- it’s not one of those things seem so real at the moment. It’s between 90 and 100 every day. The rain is missing (we are in a stage 3 drought), the lakes are 18 feet too low. The trees are still green and air conditioners are humming in the neighborhood through the night air.   But that’s okay.  After all for those on the other hemisphere its the beginning of a new season that will bring the warmth.  I met someone the other day that has never seen snow (lived in Texas his entire life and never went far enough north into the US).

So we all have our image of “autumn” – the change of the seasons that mark time in our lives.

Loving the days of summer, Autumn arrives on schedule.

The Yearning for Home

Home in the ForestI realized over the weekend that in some ways we are all yearning for a place called “home”.

It feels like for many of us, we continue the journey each day trying to embrace the concept of “home” in our lives. The place that we can feel comfort and safety, surrounded by familiar things. Familiar (root word family) in such a way that it creates an ideal combination of the emotional and spiritual things we desire in our lives.

Some say home is where the heart is. Indeed that is an element. Others get a taste and smell of it with  “comfort foods” that can allow them a type of time travel back to a time of feeling safe- perhaps with their parents or a wonderful time with their friends or just alone time. The smells of the food, the texture, the way it tastes triggers the senses and the memories that go with it.

Some of it may be  the colors that surround you, the home and hearth of another time and place that can make you change a bad mood to a good one. A comfortable chair perhaps. A warm blanket, a sunny afternoon in the yard, the fireplace, the smell of the ocean. Add the things together like a recipe for home in your head.

And home is not defined by one persons idea of it. It could be the home in the woods, or on top a skyscraper over looking metropolitan landscapes. It could be near water or on top of a mountain. In the end as we travel the journey of our lives, many of us will continue to reach out for that “home-base” in our lives. Just that reality check that we need in some way to make the rest of reality tolerant. It’s wrapped in the senses of our  spiritual place and needs our attention.

Getting Stuck and UnStuck

Horse StuckI am not sure sometimes how I get into particular situations. There are just those times when “poof” I am there. You ever have that feeling of extreme distress? You can’t believe how you got there. It’s likely that you were thinking of something else, maybe head in the clouds.

There are plenty of times where when you are feeling stuck, it seems insurmountable  Panic may ensue, or that feeling that you are never going to get out of the situation you are in. Things get blue or bleak or bad (funny how many words can describe it).

Some of my friends will surround themselves with others who are feeling the same way, so they can feel better that they are not alone in their sinking feeling. Other friends of mine will disappear off the face of the earth it seems for long periods of time. Seems like plenty of people think they have the remedy to help them get out of those feelings of being stuck in the situation they’re in.

But getting un-stuck is a challenge that has to be faced eventually. For most of us there is a time when you just have to admit that there is a way out– a solution. You have to make a decision. It’s funny sometimes that someone can “wallow’ at the bottom of a situation for so long.

We can all break-free of things if we put our minds to it. We have the ability to change things, but there are times that we just don’t. We draw out the inevitable and then later – after we finally look back – we ask ourselves “what took so long?”  There has to be someway to recognize that getting un-stuck is a choice we can all make if we want without wallowing in it. Without just standing still and wondering why things don’t change.

Advice to my kids when they feel stuck: Take action and make things change.  Sometimes I have to hear my own advice. Then God will provide.

Where Do You Draw the Line?

Are you ever finished? Where do you draw the line?

Are you ever finished? Where do you draw the line?

Don’t you think there are times you have to just say “stop” and draw the line?

I mean there are somethings that just have to get unloaded from your life as you continue to progress though it. Friends, family, work, personal commitments to managing your day and your week. You want to “be there” for everyone you can. You want to help them, support them. You want to be able to enjoy their company. Your work may demand a lot of your energy just to stay ahead… making it all that much harder to make it all work.

I have friends who burn-the-candle at both ends. They stay up late, get up early. They spend time moving from place to place and wanting to participate in just about everything. I wonder sometimes how satisfactory that experience really is. They worry if they miss something or if they are not “there” for someone who they will have failed- they struggle to be accepted.

Eventually you see them get discouraged. It’s like the analogy “If you attach one light bulb to a battery, the battery will continue to run for a long time. If you attach a dozen light bulbs to a battery, the battery will die quickly and things will l get dark.”

When you keep adding things to your calendar, piling things on top of your life, it is fairly likely you will get run down and  discouraged. You may need to un-plug from things. It can be very hard to do.

A there are so many things that can get in your way and drain the batteries   Maybe it’s a relationship, the work you do, a get together with friends or sports league or tending to all of the kid’s activities. ( I have seen parents who have their kids so plugged-in that they are heading for a crash as well).

It’s not necessarily an unwanted thing, many things can be really desirable. A being involved,participating in things can be great, but if you add up all those things in your life, you’re going to collapse because for the lack of time . You may just have to say “no” to somethings.

You cannot fall prey to peer pressure or the need to please someone. But guilt is a very strong thing, especially when you create it on your own. Or perhaps you may be holding on to a happiness or hurt. The reality is that you can never live in the past or the future; you can only live for today. Looking back in the past, or always working for what might happen tomorrow can drag you down.

I have read many blogs, I have written some myself about de-cluttering junk from your life. Maybe this is part of that clean-up, if it isn’t working for you, if it’s dragging you down,  perhaps you need to do the hardest thing… you need to let it go.

Related Posts

Negotiating With Yourself 

Organization in the Clutter of Life

Okay… New Rule

ChangeThere was a time when it was easy to know all the rules. There was the golden rule, the simple rules that made up the rules of “etiquette” that Miss Manners would teach us. They were a guide to how to react, how to look at things. How to make sure that others felt comfortable with you and who/what you were.

But these days no rules seem to be the rule. The more you can shock someone, the more you can be out of the normal trend of things – the more people may notice you. And it may not be because you did something good, it may be quite the opposite. Be shocking enough or do something that will make people be “aghast” with the way you did it. In popular culture that means you will get noticed, you will be part of the buzz or covered on TMZ or tabloid shows on television. You will show up on some magazine as the “newest” thing.

In these days it seems that  it means it has to be notched up. In order to get attention above the normal for this week, one needs to be out-of-bounds even farther than those before us. Of course to make it all work you have to add the Internet. Just do it on YouTube and have it be viral and you will be a star for next week.

It’s like being “change junkies”, even our youth here in the US are thriving on the difference. That seems to have always been the thing…but the notches have turned up higher than before. The shear out-of-bounds rules of the 50’s when kids came to school with blue-jeans on (dungarees) and people were struggling with hair cuts and music. The rules were also changing then for the youth. Now they have become so much more accelerated don’t you think?  How can our youth out-do the popular culture which is coming at us all 24/4 on any URL you wish to Google.

So we end up heading toward the potential for a more complicated life. Like working hard to keep track of the “new-rules.”  If we are going to be sure we are aware of them, it could prove to be not so simple. All of the media around us and our children’s peer groups screaming it.

My advice to my kids: Be aware of the new rules, but keep it simple. That is going to be my motto too. Just take it one day at a time, understand that you don’t have to make things be bigger, louder, meaner, faster, or on the fringe. Take care to understand the rules will change, and change is good… but don’t let those rules rule you. You can stay in control of things with the simple rules and let that drive your spirit with the power and grace.

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