Reality Check | Tracks In The Dust

Archive for the tag “Reality Check”

22 Jun 2012

Being Authentic

I have always hoped that my kids would grow up understanding the importance of being “authentic”. I think that is a word that may have many meanings to depending on your perspective; genuine, not fake or false, an original/not a copy, something has significance perhaps. Authentic shouldn’t be confused with “original” though, since we all are original, no two exactly alike. We are all God’s people because of that difference.

But to me, people who are authentic have conviction to be who they are because they are aware of themselves. Sure, over the years of growing up and even in adulthood we continue to try to emulate others; like our heroes, our parents, our mentors in living and faith, even our closest and dearest friends and lovers. And we should. Like I said in a previous post, I think we are a mosaic of all the people we have had contact with that have influenced us (good or bad). But we get to decide in the final pass what that means. It is our internal psyche that is going to accept or deny the picture of who we are.

But really didn’t want to take scientific route, I am just expecting my children to continue to be authentic. Be aware of others around them, who they are and what might have brought those people to that moment in time to intersect with our lives. But be genuine then. Be right with yourself. I laugh as I remember when they were growing up how they would desperately need to wear clothes and have their hair like their favorite rock stars. They would wear the latest anti-fashions, say words they could only have heard from other places. They would call others “posers”, when in fact they were themselves. But as they got older things changed outwardly, and hair and clothes changed with them. But always as parents we always asked them to remain true to themselves.

So I keep thinking “be authentic”. Start by being real, start by not lying to yourself about things in your life and how you treat others. Start by depending on your spiritual compass to make positive decisions. Kind of like the accountability scale I posted a while back, you have to be able to admit your mistakes, own your own situation. Then treat others that way. The adage “do onto others…” I think means being genuine to yourself first, and then to the people around you. No matter if those people are only a moment in your life as you travel through it, or family, or intended to be a lifelong dear friends… treat them authentically.

15 Jun 2012

Hit the Reset Button!

Go ahead. Push the reset button. It may be hard to find, your own personal reset may be in a complicated place in your mind. It may be in a complex set of your own personal wiring that will be hard to find. But go ahead. Do it.

A while back my wife and I spent some time with some friends in this cabin in Oklahoma (pictured here) and just kind of stopped the pattern we had all been following for so many months before. Like taking a deep breath and exhaling back out, just some times you have to stop. It was so needed we didn’t even recognise it until we were there.

Sit back in that quiet cabin in the woods, or take a bit of time to stroll through the park, or sit on the steps outside of where you live. Watch the world go by, because it doesn’t stop just because you did. But you have to be good with it anyway. You aren’t really missing anything that can’t wait for you to hit that “reset” button.

Just like when your computer gets so bogged down, or your wireless network stops transmitting the way you expect. You can hit the button and hope for the best. Let it all out. I know that we can, but then I know that often I wont. Keep insisting that I’d better plow forward with the “to do” list, to get those things done that have made me the “pro”-crastinator ( not an amateur believe me). Oh that reward of a feeling of accomplishment… feels good. So in this case, the accomplishment: Hit the button. Reset. It will still all be there to sort out. But maybe it will be much clearer than it was before…

Where ever it is, however you get there. Just take that time to make it yours and make sure that you clear the cache memory (for you geeks out there – you’ll get it). Then you can move on… it’s your time.

Posted in Before and After Things Change, Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged cherish, choices, Joy, life is precious, Oklahoma, Reality Check, Reset button, Slow Down, Sprituality

14 Jun 2012

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Contentment

Truth is, the grass is never greener on the other side. It’s greener where you water it. Being content is a reward in itself, and worthy of pursuit.

And godliness with contentment is great gain (1 Timothy 6:6).

So many times it appears that there is so much pain in our search for richness in our lives, that for many of my friends and family we tend to forget the simple reward… that is contentment itself. Like a wise friend of mine, a man of God recently recalled the old adage that the grass is never greener on the other side, it is greener where you nurture [water] it.

Some times it makes me sad to see how hard people are working for that contentment. Doesn’t it seem to you that many people are working so hard to define it and pursue it that they don’t realize it is right in front of them? So often we are making plans for the next thing that will get us to the goals we seek, that we don’t stop to see the simplicity of what is right in our path.

We can help others through kindness and compassion,endurance, love and gentleness as so many of my fellow bloggers have said in so many great ways. We can make the world around us a place we want to be. But not through anger and resentment, but through faith in ourselves. But we have to nurture that, we have work to do on making our “grass” on our side of living be green.

And that takes more than just wishing it so, it takes acceptance and peace of mind that by living it – it will come to us. That is the faith in which we need to fight for. Take hold of the eternal life we all can have. It is simple and not complicated, yet we run the other way in pursuit of something that may give us satisfaction, or instant gratification. Like if we grab that golden ring, wow… life will be so much different.

But the reality of life is that it is tough, it isn’t simple in its own daily turn of the clock. It contains the frustration or sadness of death, failures, illness, hate and fear among so many things. The reality won’t change, but you can. Accept that the grass can be green where you stand, with the water you provide to make it grow.

I recall fondly the old movie “Field of Dreams” where a farmer constructs a full baseball field in the middle of his farm in Iowa for what appears to be no reason. “If you build it they will come” the voice whispers. In fact they will come…just grow your faith in what is there in front of you, because others will see it. They will see that your grass is greener and join you for the celebration. The celebration of contentment and the richness of those who will be there with you in this otherwise complicated life while we are here on Earth.

Posted in Before and After Things Change, Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Faith, Field of Dreams, Grace, Reality Check, Religion and Spirituality, Sprituality, tracks in the dust

05 Jun 2012

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Life Beyond Normal

“Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, “Is life a multiple choice test or is it a true or false test?” …Then a voice comes to me out of the dark and says, “We hate to tell you this but life is a thousand word essay.”
― Charles M. Schulz

Somehow it always amazes me how often we get put to life’s tests. We are asked to do things that may be out of our comfort zone, things that aren’t natural to us. We can choose to ignore them, or make them a personal challenge.

For me there seems to be little reason to avoid the challenges most of the time. After all, you have only your own minds-eye to reason a lot of it out. Not those dangerous or harmful challenges, those can be much easier to decide on the course. But for example, being challenged to step out and make a difference in someone elses life may seem like a chore. Showing someone gratitude for something they have done for you can be easy, but going those steps further than just saying “thank you” can be a bit harder.

So here I stand, trying to reason out the “multiple choice” or “true/false” answer to things when it is truly an “essay” as Charles M. Schulz said. And that can be difficult; shades of right and wrong and multiple directions that would all work,yet that aren’t entirely obvious at first thought.

So the next time someone says “How are you?” – you probably already know the answer. But in reality the answer is so much more complex. The concern is so much deeper. So let’s all persevere and make the more of what God has given to us. Going beyond the easy answers are progress at it best, the changes, the challenges, addressing those things that just aren’t the normal things that make up our everyday life.

Like one of my favorite musicians in my life time had said:

“Without deviations from the norm, progress is not possible.”
― Frank Zappa

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Change, Charles M. Schulz, choices, Deviation from the norm, Frank Zappa, Postive Thinking, Reality Check, Tests

04 Jun 2012

Talk Yourself Into It

As it has been said, your thoughts determine your feelings and your feelings determine your actions. If you want to change your life, you have to control the way you think. Sadly I see so many of my friends and co-workers who seem to be talking themselves into being negative about themselves and others.

Science says that you’re constantly talking to yourself — all the time. Your mind is talking to you! I bet you are talking to yourself right now. Research shows that most people speak at a rate of 150 to 200 words per minute, but your mind can listen to about 500 to 600 words a minute. That’s why you can listen to one person while planning what you are doing tonight at the same time.

It’s been measured that the conversation we have with ourselves — is at a rate of 1,300 words per minute. Because your mind sees in pictures, and you can see a thought in a nanosecond.

So your personal conversation may be saying, in effect, “Everything I say puts me down.” Like most of us, you are your own worst critic. Seems like we’re always putting ourselves down. We walk into a room, smiling, but inside we’re thinking, “I don’t look right. I don’t fit in. I may not be able to talk well with strangers. I’m sure they will think I am boring.”

God wants us to stop putting ourselves down. When you put yourself down, who are you really putting down? When you say these bad things you’re really pointing to God, who made you. When you say, “God, I’m worthless. I’m no good. I can’t do anything,” you’re saying, “God, you blew it with me.” That’s why God says it’s wrong to put yourself down.

“Fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right … Think about all you can thank God for and be glad about” (Philippians 4:8 LB).

So, don’t think about all those weaknesses in your life. There isn’t a better thing you can do to raise your confidence level than to start believing that you should fix your thoughts on what is true, good and right. You are valuable; you are significant; you have the ability; you are more than capable.”

Ref: Inspired by Rick Warren.