choices | Tracks In The Dust

Archive for the tag “choices”

25 Oct 2013

Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt

Fear, uncertainty and doubt. The FUD factor.

It is really the basis for a lot of decisions in our life. It plays on us – chips away at the confidence of a decision. It can influence the paths we take, the things we say, the attempts we make on the important things we do and the trivial things.

Recognizing it is part of the challenge. Some times our brave selves, our fearless selves get in the way and can let us go ahead with a bad idea as well. It is a great equalizer.

Even those people who you know who seem fearless, who tread ahead without regard for the outcome. They have their own fears and doubts. Even they are uncertain at times. Quietly they may approach some things that others are amazed. But there are deep-seated fears there.

Fear, uncertainty and doubt. It can rule you or you can adjust. You can have trust where you didn’t before, You can look at things in a different way, you can step out of your comfort zone and prove something to yourself. If there are failures, looking at them as short-term set backs may be right. Taking another whack at things isn’t out of the question many times. You can convince yourself there is no 2nd chance. But that is possibly FUD happening again.

So let’s face it 🙂 there are many obstacles in your way. Creating more isn’t a good idea. I am working on over coming my FUD factors – it is something that is going to take constant reminding – starting from ME. Remembering that HE is there for me always. Taking the time to make the time to be ready.

Now how about you? It starts with you.

Overcoming Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt (vincefrese.wordpress.com)

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, attitude, choices, Doing new things, Doubt, Fear, FUD factor, Life, moments, Postive Thinking, Preparation, uncertainty and doubt

07 Oct 2013

Contradiction

We all get them… There are a lot of mixed messages in today’s’ world.

A lot of it is the fact that we live in the “information age” I think. It happens all around us. No matter what we see or hear, there seems to be a question of reality. We read news, we track social networks, we watch media provide up to the minute real-time events in our living room.

What we see can sometime contradict what we believe is true, and still we may tend to deny what our eyes are seeing.There are other times we see or read something, that won’t validate what we want to believe so we will dismiss it. It contradicts our beliefs and then we are not going to accept the evidence.

There are a lot of people who outwardly say sincerely that they care about people and causes. But their actions contradict that. They follow their religious or personal philosophies, but only when it fits in their lives. Like the message of LOVE and the practice of HATE. They may be saying that people “in need” should be helped, but shouldn’t help them in any way even if they are provided many opportunities. I guess almost all of us need to work harder all the time to focus on people in-need.

It is easy to say and do things that don’t make sense to everything else in our lives. It can be the principle of the moment and long-term it doesn’t play out. But there are many times I think I need to stop and review what is “in-coming” in my life and make sure I am convicted to the “outcome” – and not contradict myself. Does that happen in your life, too?

Posted in Learning Lessons Along the Journey Of Life and tagged Change, choices, Contradiction, Definitions, Information Age, Intentions, Kindness, Memories, Philosophy, Postive Thinking, Reality Check

03 Oct 2013

“Who Are You?”

Not to get all Freudian or something, but i constantly continue to meet people who are struggling to understand themselves better. So I am bringing it up again.

It seems that people may not be able to personally define who they are perhaps. They have a lot of friends, family and lovers (past and present), around them who are more than willing to tell them how they define them.

But the reality is: if you could not ask the people around you…how would you define yourself?

Easy to put on different costumes and personalities to show to others, through different phases of a relationship with someone, different pieces of the “real you” may not be immediately exposed.

Asking the question “Who do you believe you are?” without parroting back what others say you are is hard to do and seems to require inner inspection. Are you the same person inside as you appear to others? So easy at first to say “yes”- but the last person you should lie to is yourself and it is easy to do ( at least I can say that personally in a truthful way).

So go ahead…ask yourself who you are. Be honest. Are you a singer, a lover of horses, a follower of sports? Labels.

Are you someone who thrives on interaction, or just likes interaction to validate who you are… letting that define the real you.

Deeper, who are you spiritually? Sure there are labels: a scientist, a teacher, a lover, a friend. That’s easy to do… just add it to your Facebook profile already… but who are you when the world and others don’t label you.

Worse yet, once you think you know who you are– try comparing that to how others see you.

Some of my closest friends have lost marriages, significant family relationships and friendships because they realized that they were trying to become someone they weren’t ever going to be, or worse yet were trying desperately to fit into something someone else wanted them to be. We always evolve from the foundation of who we are- but before you can really grow- you need to know what that foundation consists of.

I sound like a bunch of songs from the Who (queue “Who Are You” or “The Real Me“) or like the dozens of philosophers from my college classes. Seems like we are always in need of introspection.

My advice to my kids:

In this busy world – with constant input coming from so many different places- with almost instant feedback [more than any other time before in history], we need to be sure our first definition of ourselves is ours.

Your Circumstances Don’t Define You, Your Response Does (betterlifecoachingblog.com)

Posted in Learning Lessons Along the Journey Of Life and tagged Acceptance, Being Labelled, choices, Defining Yourself, Doubt, Ego, Faith, Love, relationship, Self-Awareness, Who Are You

01 Oct 2013

Meaning

Meaning. A big word that means a lot. People are looking for meaning in life, and wanting meaning in what they do. I know it is important to me, and it seem to be that every one is seeking it.

Maybe it is a meaning for the job? After getting paid, it would be nice to know that you are a contributor, that you make a difference in the job, that you get recognized for the work you have done.

Maybe it is understanding “why” – defining the meaning to injustice in our lives and the world around us, the unfair things that happen to others, to you. Understanding why people are violently hurting each other, hating each other, making life miserable for others.

It could be the ultimate “meaning of life“- looking for the spiritual center. Are we really only on earth for such a short time only to have it all end? Is there something more? What are we supposed to do while we are here on earth? (that is a topic for another day, but it is clear then that eternity matters most).

People want meaning in their lives too. So many want to mean something to someone. To the ones they love, to their family and friends. They want to be significant in their lives.

There is the gallant goal of doing something meaningful (good or bad) in life. Showing mankind that you have something more to give can make for a lifelong task. Sometimes achieved, sometimes never reached. Not all the heavy stuff of Kant’s enlightenment or something. Just searching.

So in the end- what is that driving meaning in your life? Can you reach for it? Is it elusive or in-reach? Are you always looking elsewhere and not right in front of you? It can be so simple I think, yet so difficult to find. It can be a daily driving force. A preoccupation that can consume us. It can find us somewhere in a “hollow” place, It can be infinitely rewarding.

Here’s my take on it: Look for it in the closest places. In your heart not your mind, in the eyes of others, in the places that provide peace in your life. Look for it in God, look for it in the air you breathe. Breathe in. The meaning is there.

The meaning of life per perspective. (williamkiddjr.wordpress.com)
Youth ,hopes and dreams- meaning to life (rajatkumar1069.wordpress.com)

Posted in Learning Lessons Along the Journey Of Life and tagged Acceptance, choices, Fear, God, Grace, Happiness, Joy, Meaning of life, moments, Philosophy, Reality Check, Religion and Spirituality, Searching for Significance, Who Are You

30 Sep 2013

Believe In Love

There are times when I forget, I get so involved with the mechanics of life that I easily ignore the reality of things. The world is full of struggles. Full of pain and anger. Full of things that we cannot effect at the moment but can influence our day, change our mood, make things cloudy on a sunny day.

That’s when I remember the power of love. Of believing in love and what it can mean. For my life, living in the spirit that is God and the love of my wife who is there for me no matter what happens.

Many people are equally as fortunate. Not every one I understand. But there are so many people out there that turn their back on love. They will deny it; but they’re making a path away from love.

There is this great song called BELIEVE by Elton John that always catches me thinking about it again. I am sharing this, the statements of war, money, dictators, churches, politics and papers all get tangled up in what we should believe. Believe in love.

Believe

I believe in love, it’s all we got
Love has no boundaries, costs nothing to touch
War makes money, cancer sleeps
Curled up in my father and that means something to me
Churches and dictators, politics and papers
Everything crumbles sooner or later
But love, I believe in love

I believe in love, it’s all we got
Love has no boundaries, no borders to cross
Love is simple, hate breeds
Those who think difference is the child of disease
Father and son make love and guns
Families together kill someone
Without love, I believe in love

Without love I wouldn’t believe
In anything that lives and breathes
Without love I’d have no anger
I wouldn’t believe in the right to stand here
Without love I wouldn’t believe
I couldn’t believe in you
And I wouldn’t believe in me
Without love

I believe in love
I believe in love
I believe in love