Tracks In The Dust

A Father's Advice About Learning the Mission of Life

Archive for the tag “Grace”

30 Sep 2013

Believe In Love

There are times when I forget, I get so involved with the mechanics of life that I easily ignore the reality of things. The world is full of struggles. Full of pain and anger. Full of things that we cannot effect at the moment but can influence our day, change our mood, make things cloudy on a sunny day.

That’s when I remember the power of love. Of believing in love and what it can mean. For my life, living in the spirit that is God and the love of my wife who is there for me no matter what happens.

Many people are equally as fortunate. Not every one I understand. But there are so many people out there that turn their back on love. They will deny it; but they’re making a path away from love.

There is this great song called BELIEVE by Elton John that always catches me thinking about it again. I am sharing this, the statements of war, money, dictators, churches, politics and papers all get tangled up in what we should believe. Believe in love.

Believe

I believe in love, it’s all we got
Love has no boundaries, costs nothing to touch
War makes money, cancer sleeps
Curled up in my father and that means something to me
Churches and dictators, politics and papers
Everything crumbles sooner or later
But love, I believe in love

I believe in love, it’s all we got
Love has no boundaries, no borders to cross
Love is simple, hate breeds
Those who think difference is the child of disease
Father and son make love and guns
Families together kill someone
Without love, I believe in love

Without love I wouldn’t believe
In anything that lives and breathes
Without love I’d have no anger
I wouldn’t believe in the right to stand here
Without love I wouldn’t believe
I couldn’t believe in you
And I wouldn’t believe in me
Without love

I believe in love
I believe in love
I believe in love

Posted in Life's Sound Track (Music) and tagged cherish, choices, Elton John, Faith, God, Grace, Happiness, Kindness, life is precious, Love, Music, relationships, Sprituality

25 Sep 2013

This Never Happened Before

My wife and I find that things are quite different these days.

Maybe you could call it “empty nest syndrome” or something like that, but actually it is just more about becoming older. Not the kind of “older” that means turning into a senior citizen. But the older that is more about knowing who we are, what we want and what is important to us.

We have been living most our lives together headed toward the future. Getting married, finishing school, moving around the country to find the next part of a career to support our family, and owning a home. Kids, yes we wanted kids. When we were younger we would think that maybe six kids would be great – yup a big family. As we decided to have children we determined six was not in the plan after the 2nd one we knew . In the end, four was enough.

But we spent much of their lives ( our lives) as the grew up being sure they were healthy, happy ( too much about that sometimes). that they had a good moral compass, good work ethic, made good decisions ( believe me they did not always make good decisions… sometimes really really poor ones). There to support them. It was our imperative. We love them. We wanted only the best for them and wanted to surround them with the things that matter (love would have been enough).

But now they are old enough ( all over 20 actually) and can make their own way through things each day. Just like my wife and I did when we were young. Oh we will be there for them whenever they need us, advice. sympathy, finances (sometimes), we enjoy and have excitement for their progress in the world.

But this never happened before: We have to make our way with our love to a new place, One that will be centered more around US and less around growing up with the kids in mind. We are what is needed for the future. We need to make that a priority.

Life is short, and it is definitely shorter on the downhill ride. Love my wife very much. This is the way it should be for lovers.

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life, Life's Sound Track (Music) and tagged Beatles, Compassion, Empty nest syndrome, Family, Grace, Growing Older, Kids, life is precious, Music, Parent, Paul McCartney, Postive Thinking, Who Are You

18 Sep 2013

2 Comments

Anger

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. James 1, verses 19-20.

I will admit, I have been angry often in my life. Things just don’t go as you think it should. You see things that seem unjust, unfair, evil or wrong and you get mad.

There are always going to be things beyond your control, but you can always control your anger. It can sap you of energy, sway you from your real mission. It can wrap itself in frustration and confusion, and leave others in its wake. Anger can blind you from what is really important, and preoccupy your valuable and constructive time doing other things.

It is interesting how sometimes when you are angry, where you may end up direct the anger. Blaming others, sometimes lashing out toward the people you love the most. Anger can fuel more anger, in others around you. Even in people who really don’t know you.

So i am much more aware of it now. Understanding that there are circumstances that are simply beyond your control. Not saying to give up on things, but there are battles to choose, and efforts worthwhile. Quick to listen as the verse says, it very wise as well. So much anger seems spontaneous and often can be misunderstanding, not knowing the complete picture. So patience and slow to be angry. Got it.

Related post from Dave is worth reading and I am sharing.

Proverbial About Anger

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Advice, Anger, Anger Management, choices, Emotion, Faith, God, Grace, Happiness, misunderstanding, Reality Check, Self-Awareness

15 Aug 2013

Conditions and Compromise

It’s interesting how often these days interaction with someone can always come to “certain conditions”. Doing favors or helping someone with something can end up as a negotiation of sorts. Sort of the payback for things that are done.

The idea of “unconditional” love and friendship is still alive I think, It is definitely a spiritual center we all need to achieve. It makes our lives less complicated in a way. It is the grace of God. Yet it seems like there are days where things only happen under certain terms.

There are a lot of conditions in life. Sort of like: “I can help you with your problem, but IF I do you need to help me with mine.” Negotiation isn’t always bad, but it will struggle to lead to longer term relationships

Conditional love is the hardest one to cope with. Like trying to earn someone’s love and attention, it comes with a price. It has a manipulating qualifier to it. I will love you, if only you would be more attentive to my needs. I will love you if only you make enough time for me to do what I want to do.

It goes on and on : I will love you if you a) lose weight b) gain status, c) dress a certain way, d) be friends with the people I am friends with, e) NOT be friends with the people you are friends with. f) like the colour “blue” – or hundreds upon hundreds of other conditions.

There is something about compromise in a relationship (which is healthy) that can spill over into conditions. When it does there may not be an immediate way to recognize it. But it exists. And over time it can lead to resentment, to disillusion that ends in someone being very hurt.

So I always give my kids that advice, Be sure to “be yourself” and be aware of the difference between compromises in a relationship and conditions.

Practice Unconditional Love (alexiaisaak.com)

Posted in Doing Things That Will Change Your Life and tagged Acceptance, Advice, Conditional, Doubt, God, Grace, Perception, Philosophy, relationship, Self-Awareness, Sprituality, Unconditional Love

24 Jun 2013

“Mad” or “Sad”?

I was in a grocery store over the weekend and I heard a lady exclaim to her husband how “really mad” she was about the fact that a cracker company had discontinued her preferred sized box.

I had to laugh a bit because I couldn’t think of a situation such as that where it would make me be “really” mad. I always thought that “mad” was reserved for horrific things that happened to people or circumstances that became unable to control or ultimately did not turn out the way we expected. Even then there is a fine line I think between mad and sad (or disappointed I suppose).

It seems like more and more people are “mad” at things that really stretch the idea of or being angry. There is room for anger in our lives; applied to those things that may some how stimulate us to a better life, to be more conscientious or be stronger for someone or some cause.

It seems the “madness” I see stems from something else. Perhaps the frustration of the moment or the feeling of helplessness. More than ever before, there seem to be a lot of people who are more angry over things that they cannot change. That is likely because in this “information age” of constant incoming data we are increasingly more exposed to things we can get mad at.

Maybe that is the idea of what someone means when they refer to the past as “simpler times”? Maybe because of ignorance (which I have heard is bliss) or maybe though intentional avoidance, some people just didn’t have to deal with being angry in those simpler times. As time has changed, and war, poverty, hate, disease and the like have come 24/7 into our lives, maybe we have become an angrier society?

Whatever the path, seems like something to be sad about. Perhaps mad; but likely sad…because the ability to turn off that 24/7 input has passed many people by. Unless we ourselves make a choice.

Be mad if you need to, but remember to be sad when you can. Either way you have to find a place where you can move on…. make a difference, change what’s happening, or focus on something else that you can effect. Getting “stuck” in mad is maddening enough.